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Single mother’s relationship – Ciscasquapro

From a concerned parent:

I am a single mother of three children. First born is 19 years, second born 16 years and the only girl, last born is 12 years. I have raised them all by myself. I have a job and so I am able to meet their needs.

A year ago I met a man in my life whom I feel it’s more than a friendship. He is a widower with two children who are above 20years and we are planning to move together as a husband and a wife. My worry is my children who are teenagers. I don’t know how to approach them. I fear their reaction.

I feel I need someone to love me as a husband but I am worried on the reaction of my kids. How will I tell them that we will be moving in with a man who will be their dad? Moving from my house to the man’s house and stay as a family? If you come across this lines, kindly advise.

Yours concerned mother

Have you ever experienced such a scenario? Or if it were you what could you have done? Let’s help the worried mother through the chat.

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How good do you know your child? – Ciscasquapro

Have you ever been tricked by your own child? How did you feel after you realized what had happened? How did you react?

The busy schedule of parents Sometimes makes it impossible to have ample time with their children. Understanding them becomes a bit difficult because they will play angels when the parents are around and something different when parents are away. At the back of parents’ minds, what they have is a good boy or a girl who adheres to the instructions given not until the reality dawns on to them.

This reminds me on an incident that happened at school when my daughter was in grade three. I had gone to pick her report form and what the teacher told me left me surprised.

My girl had always been a quiet child with less to talk about. She used most of her time watching cartoons. She wasn’t a child one would keep scolding. She was very careful on making sure she didn’t do anything that would make me unhappy.

The teacher had this to say:

Your daughter has done very well, but I have one thing to accuse her of. She is the best noise maker in class. First she makes sure she has finished her work, then goes on disturbing others. Every teacher is complaining

I looked at her suspeciously. Her innocent looking made me to question the teacher’s remarks. I wanted to hear it from the horse’s mouth. True to the accusations, she testified that after playing a bad girl at school, she becomes too tied and that makes her to be cool when at home.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. From that day I promised myself never again judge the book by it’s cover.

Have you ever been in a such scenario where you think your child is what he or she is not?

A certain lady was told by her neighbours that her teenage girl had been seen with suspecious company when the parents were away. She was very mad on it and told her neighbours to leave her girl alone and they were just jealous of her.

After two weeks, the lady received an anonymous call informing her that her girl had been arrested for gun trafficking and she should go to the police station.

Afterwards, the girl took the police to their house where she was hiding the guns. Seeing this, the mother fainted and was rushed to the hospital.

What should we do as parents when we hear these allegations?

My opinion…..listen carefully to what is being said. Before you act, come up with your own ways to investigate what you have been told. If the child is smarter, involve your close friends and her peers secretly just to get to know the reality. This will give you a chance to study every move your child is undertaking. Be calm to both the child and whoever gave you the news.

With this, you will be able to get to the root of the matter and henceforth deal with it as required.

Though people can be malicious sometimes, never ignore before you get to know what is happening. Let not your love to the child blindfold you not to see the reality.

More on children discipline and on teenage relationship is discussed here.

I would love to hear how you solved the problem or how you can do it incase such scenario crosses your path… comment.

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In Africa kenya News Parenting Readers The world Uncategorized

My YouTube videos – Ciscas

As we raise our children, there are many obstacles that comes on our way. My Let’s know YouTube channel has tried to discuss some of them. If you haven’t visited it, kindly do it. Like, share and subscribe. Always remember to put notification on incase you miss the up coming videos.

Ciscasquapro

I take this opportunity to welcome all parents to my YouTube channel – Let’s Know

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClyvkMUdMAmiYR08kOUB4Ng

The stuff here will be based on parenting.

Kindly like, share with other parents and subscribe. Put notification on so that you don’t miss upcoming videos.

There is a sister channel Ciscas which has Children stuff on morals and values…

Help kids connect to it. It will be of great help to them. Here it is..

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